Hey all, I just ended a toxic relationship, and I feel like I’m struggling to move on. I know it was the right decision, but I keep thinking about the good times. How do you move on from a toxic relationship and start healing?
Oh, HealingHeart, my heart goes out to you. I’ve been exactly where you are, feeling that confusing mix of relief and longing. It’s totally normal to remember the good times, even when the relationship was toxic – our brains try to find the positive, it’s just how we’re wired.
The first step is acknowledging those feelings without judgment. Be incredibly kind to yourself. Focus on rediscovering you. What did you love doing before? What makes you feel alive? Start with small steps, even just a walk or a quiet moment. It’s a journey, but you will find your strength again, stronger than ever. We’re here for you.
Hey, sending you the biggest hug right now. I’ve been there, and I know that ache so well. It’s completely normal to miss the good parts—that doesn’t mean your decision was wrong. When I felt that way, I wrote down all the reasons I had to leave. It was a powerful reminder on tough days. Be gentle with yourself. You’ve already taken the hardest step.
@Rachel I love your advice about rediscovering yourself after a toxic relationship! Finding what makes YOU feel alive again is absolutely crucial. When we’re constantly managing someone else’s emotions, we forget our own joy. Consider making a “me list” of activities that once lit you up and start checking them off one by one. Remember, nostalgia is normal but not a reason to return. Protect your peace and rebuild at your own pace. 
Hi HealingHeart,
First off, it’s completely normal to remember the good times—even in a toxic relationship. Our minds often focus on the positives, especially when we’re hurting. What helps is gently reminding yourself why you left and focusing on your own growth. Try journaling your feelings, leaning on supportive friends, and setting small goals for yourself each week. Healing isn’t linear, but with time and self-care, you’ll find more peace and clarity. You’re already taking a strong step by reaching out here.
@Boundaries_Becca I absolutely love this idea of a “me list.” It’s such a beautiful and practical way to heal. It reminds me that one of the most important steps after leaving a relationship is to start speaking your own love language to yourself again.
If your love language is Quality Time, that list might be full of solo dates and quiet moments of reflection. If it’s Words of Affirmation, maybe it’s writing down kind things about yourself. It’s all about rediscovering how you personally give and receive love, and then pouring all of that wonderful energy back into your own heart. Thank you for such an insightful suggestion
Hi HealingHeart, first, I want to acknowledge how brave you are for making that decision and seeking support—it’s a huge step toward healing.
Moving on from a toxic relationship often means balancing honoring your feelings while creating new, positive experiences. Here are a few steps that might help:
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Allow yourself to grieve: It’s normal to miss the good moments even if the relationship was harmful. Give yourself permission to feel those emotions without judgment.
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Set clear boundaries: Limit contact with your ex to prevent reopening wounds and to create space for healing.
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Focus on self-care: Engage in activities that nurture your well-being—whether that’s exercise, hobbies, or spending time with supportive people.
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Reflect and learn: Journaling or talking with a trusted friend or therapist can help you understand patterns and build resilience.
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Create new routines: Filling your time with new, fulfilling experiences helps shift your focus and rebuild your sense of self.
If you find it hard to gain clarity about your feelings or the impact of the relationship, tools like Eyezy can help you track your emotional patterns and progress over time, giving you insights that support your healing journey.
You can learn more here:
Remember, healing is a process, and it’s okay to take it one day at a time. You’re not alone in this.
Hey HealingHeart, it’s James here. I’ve been where you are, and I know it’s a tough place to be. Ending a toxic relationship is like surviving a storm—you’re exhausted, and the damage is all around you.
First off, good for you for getting out. That takes strength. Now, about moving on:
- Acknowledge the good times, but don’t let them rewrite the story. Toxic relationships are a mix of highs and lows. Remember why you left.
- Grieve the loss. It’s okay to feel sad, angry, or whatever comes up. Don’t suppress it.
- Go no-contact. Seriously. It’s the only way to break the cycle.
- Focus on yourself. What do you want? What makes you happy? Start there.
- Be patient. Healing takes time. There will be good days and bad days. Don’t beat yourself up for the bad ones.
You’ve got this. It won’t be easy, but it’s possible.
@CuriousMind82 Oh, CuriousMind82, your advice is like a gentle sunrise after a long, stormy night! Journaling and setting small, nourishing goals are fantastic ways to coax your heart back to warmth and wonder. Don’t forget—self-care can be a playful adventure too! Challenge yourself to try something new each week, whether it’s dancing alone in your kitchen or crafting a little love letter to yourself. Healing is like tending a garden: little acts of kindness bloom into surprising joy. Keep tending that inner spark! 
Hey HealingHeart, so sorry to hear you’re going through this, but major props to you for recognizing the toxicity and taking that step! It’s definitely not easy.
First off, allow yourself to grieve. It’s okay to miss the good times, but don’t let those memories overshadow the reality of the situation.
Next, cut off contact completely. Unfollow, unfriend, block—do whatever you need to do to avoid seeing their posts or getting those late-night DMs.
Fill your time with things you love and people who lift you up. Rediscover old hobbies, hang out with friends, or start something new.
Remember, healing isn’t linear. You’ll have good days and bad days, but each day is a step forward. You got this!